Online dating is a numbers game, especially if you’re a guy. Attractive girls get bombarded with messages from guys on a daily basis, many of which get deleted or never even read. You need to make your message stand out so she doesn’t delete it. Not only do you need to craft a clever message, but you also need to message multiple people on a daily basis to increase your reply rate. Again, it’s a numbers game.
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Sending only one message per day really isn’t enough. You should message as many people as possible. When I used the app in the past, there were times I would message ten to twenty different women in one day. The messages should be interesting, mentioning something from their profile to prove you read it. In addition to sending lots of well-written messages, you should also use more than one dating app. Two of my favorites are the Facebook dating app and Bumble.
On the actual Plenty of Fish dating website, not the app, I noticed in the past when I’d send lots of messages, my profile seemed to get more views too. I believe this has something to do with their algorithm. The more active you are on the app, the more your profile is viewed. The time of day you send messages is important too. The best time of day to send messages is in the evening when people are home from work and less busy.
4. Stay Positive
Online dating can be frustrating and disappointing at times. There are days where you’ll get a lot of replies and other times nothing at all. The rejection can damage your confidence, but it’s important not to take it personally or let your frustration be known in your profile and messages to women. Keep things positive in your profile and photos too.
When sending messages and interacting with women in general, staying positive goes a long way. If you sound negative and unpleasant, you will be ignored, or even blocked. Even if things don’t work out, keep it positive from start to finish. There were a couple of times on POF where girls I had brief but positive interactions with in the past would come back around, sending me a message out of the blue.
5. Write a Funny Plenty of Fish Headline
POF is one of the only dating apps that lets you include a profile headline. It’s easy to blow it off and not put much thought into it, but if your headline is funny, you’ll get more profile views and messages from girls commenting on it.
You should definitely avoid writing anything negative for the headline or anything boring like “Hi.” Writing something funny and clever works really well. Using tasteful humor in messages works well too.
6. Sort Profiles by Last Visit
The search filter allows you to sort profiles by “last visit” or “newest users.” Searching by last visit puts the most recently logged in profiles at the top of the page. These are the people you want to be messaging first because they’re freshly logged in and active, in most cases.
Avoid messaging anyone with “online in the last thirty days” noted next to their profile. Focus on messaging people who are online now to increase your chances of a reply. Alternatively, if you’ve already messaged most of the “last visit” profiles, you can try searching the newest users too. The only problem I’ve encountered with this is that newer users are more likely to be new to online dating, so they’re often hesitant to meet. They want to take their time, but not always. It’s worth experimenting with both search criteria.